It's hard to believe

It's hard to believe it has been 4 years today since my little brother died. It's hard to believe that I never get to see him get married or hold his first born. It's hard to believe that there will be no more holiday or birthday parties with his contagious smile present. I wish my kids could have known him, he was an incredible uncle. He was patient and kind, quiet but confident. He always had a joke he thought was much funnier than they really were and a story that always topped yours. I miss our comical debates and the pure silliness you found in things when you were with him. I miss being little and riding our bikes around the block and outdoor sleepovers on the trampoline. I just miss him. I have a picture of him I get to look out everyday and a heart full of memories and I am so grateful I got to have such a special person in my life. He taught me so much about tolerance and kindness and love. Losing someone you love so dearly really makes you appreciate life so much more. It's reality that we may not always have the ones we love at an arms reach. Tonight I hug my kids a little tighter because life is too short. Cameron I love you so much.